Italian guards offer pasta settlement to fishermen families

The Italian guards who are accused of gunning down two fishermen in Indian waters have offered an out of court settlement to the families. The two fishermen were perceived as pirates and shot at by the Italian guards despite no provocation from the fishermen leading to their arrest. The event also escalated into a diplomatic row between India and Italy.

The accused guards have requested an out of court settlement, and offered a a lifetime supply of pasta to the families of the two fishermen. This was revealed at a press conference held by the Italian envoy Deputy Foreign Minister Staffan De Mistura.

"The wife of one of the slain fishermen has asked for a compensation of Rs. 1 Crore. The guards have instead offered a supply of any variety of pasta that the families desire. They will be getting a 5 kg bag every month and it will be top quality pasta." said Mr De Mistura. He also added "If the shipment fails to arrive, then Italy will extradite the two guards to India."

This is an unprecedented offer, and the families of the two slain fishermen are  getting legal advice on the next course of action.

Italy continues to claim that the incident happened in international waters and the soldiers must be tried in Italy. However, Indian authorities refuted the claim and had arrested the two guards after the ship was escorted to shore by the Indian Coast Guard.

Govt withdraws cases against Google, Facebook; To use their storage and search

The Government of India has withdrawn the cases relating to posting of objectionable content against Google and Facebook, Kapil Sibal, central minister of Communications & Information Technology stated in a press conference today.

Sibal had earlier stated that companies must pre-screen content before making it available on the web. Last month, the government had also sanctioned prosecution of Google and Facebook objectionable content posted on sites hosted by them. Both companies have steadfastly maintained that they cannot be held accountable for content posted on their sites, pre-screening is technically impossible, and it also violates the right to free speech.

The sudden withdrawal of the case comes as a surprise. However, it is learnt that both companies have reached a settlement with the government, and are embarking on Project 1983.365 where they will host various private information that the government has gathered about individuals over time and from the UUID and National Population Register projects. A Google employee on condition of anonymity stated "It is much cheaper to spend a few hundred dollars on large capacity hard disks than the loss of business we would incur if the Government were to force us to stop operations". When asked how the companies stand to gain, the employee said "The data we get from the Government is semi-structured. And will be a wonderful test set for our search and data mining algorithms. We will also provide the government with software it mine data from this store.

Kapil Sibal refused to accept or deny this information and stated that "the Govt of India" is not a big brother and respects everyone's rights.

Oprah sponsors political party in India, buys Kolaveri rights.

Oprah Winfrey announced today that she will be sponsoring a new political party in India, After visiting the "charmingly chaotic" country, meeting the Bachchan family, and attending a plethora of parties, the celebrity announced that she will be sponsoring a new political party.

As for the agenda of the party, she said, that it will be no different from the agenda of any other party. But, in addition the party will host its own talk show where celebrities could interact with the party members.She said, "I will not be able to relocate to India due to personal reasons, however I will sponsor the party for a period of 1 year, and  will continue to be the chief mentor".

As the party anthem, Oprah mentioned that she has already purchased the rights for the popular "Why this Kolaveri" song and intends to use that as the anthem. She said that the song is very inspirational and will motivate people, though she refused to comment on what she found inspirational in it. 

MEA expels Chinese diplomats. Says they are "Made in China"

The Ministry of External affairs today expelled all Chinese diplomats and has asked for the embassy to be vacated. This move comes under growing concern and pressure of fake products made in China, but carrying well known Indian brands and labels being sold in India.

 Taking note of the fake products issue, the Government of India decided to ban everything made in China. Following up on this development, the Ministry of External Affairs today ordered the Chinese embassy to be vacated and all diplomats to leave the country, because they were also "made in China".

The Chinese government said that this move was not good for improving bilateral relations between the two countries and has requested that the Ambassador and two other diplomatic staff be allowed to stay, because they were not conceived in China. The MEA is reportedly considering the request and expected to take a decision by tomorrow.

Gujjars, Meenas strike in Rajasthan. Demand equal share of Bhanwari Devi case

Two major clans in Rajasthan, the Gujjars and the Meenas went on strike in the state today, crippling most activities except essential services. Both the clans claim that the members of the state legislature are unfairly hogging the spotlight in the Bhanwari Devi kidnapping and murder case.

In a jointly organized press conference at Jaipur today, spokespersons from both tribes stated that the current MLAs and MLCs are conspiring to ensure neither clan gets any exposure in the disappearance and subsequent killing of Bhanwari Devi. Former minister Mahipal Maderna and Parasram Bishnoi were remanded to judical custody till the 24th of December, and her husband, Amar Chand was recently arrested by the CBI.

The tribes say that they haven't been given their due in this case of sleaze, lies, and political aspirations, and that the men of the caste were feeling outcast in their own state. They have demanded and apology from Maderna for not having a Gujjar/Meena involved and have asked for written assurance that going forward, an equal number of members from each tribe will be.part of any such act. They will withdraw their strike only after getting the assurance from the chief minister.

This is a rare show of unity by both clans which were at loggerheads in 2004  after Gujjars started an agitation to get included in list of Scheduled Tribes.

Bhajji enters Big Boss

Indian cricketer Harbhajan Singh  gate-crashed into the Big Boss house today, less than a week after Andrew Symonds was brought in. Both Symonds and Bhajji are not part of their respective teams for India's tour of Australia.

In addition to gate-crashing the house, Bhajji also carried along with him a mysterious bag, which he said was a present for Symonds, which must be handed to him when he exits the house, either through eviction or winning.

There is much speculation about the present, and strong indicators suggest that it might be a stuffed monkey.

Meanwhile, S. Sreesanth, who was allegedly slapped by Bhajji during an IPL match, sent him the best wishes to stay on in the house and possibly win the season. In a press release, Sreesanth told Harbhajan to 'make it large in Big Boss, because his cricketing career is all but over'. Harbhajan or his agent were unavailable for comment.

Story idea thanks to Neets

Tokens sold at token fast.

The token fast undertaken by Anna Hazare took on an all-new meaning today with  tokens being sold at the venue. The numbered tokens were actually tickets to enter the venue where Hazare is on a day long fast in order to press the government to enact a strong anti-corruption law.

Supporters could redeem the token for one cup of hot beverage (tea/coffee/milk) and some biscuits available at the venue.  It was understood that the move was proposed by Ms Kiran Bedi, who was recently accused of inflating her travel bills and obtaining an excess reimbursement. Ms Bedi's had already spent the excess money she had received and decided to use selling tickets as a means of raising funds. The move, however, was approved by the core committee which decided to sell tickets and all profits would go to the funds for 'India Against Corruption'.

In addition to entry tokens, special tokens were also available for people who intended to shake hands with any of the core committee members. However, none of these were reportedly sold.